Life has been pretty un-eventful, I don't see the point in blogging about the same old shit all the time...it would get very boring and I don't like to moan about my life, there are people who are a lot worse off than I am. Today I had a session of counseling, Knowing what I am like I asked Amber to come with me to make sure I got to the appointment, I have a habit of not going, mainly due to the panic attacks. I would have liked her to stay however she had to go to work. I managed to survive the appointment and then I even managed the 5 min cycle from there to work, this sounds like no big deal but when being alone outside is like a nightmare come true this is a big step. I got to work desperate for a hug form Amber, however she was busy so had to be patient, the brave face went on along with makeup and I could 'pretend' all was well. Once Amber had finished all her clients I was able to get my longed for hugz, this made my day and I felt so much better. I know that regardless I am well supported :)

Unfortunately I think I have been leaning on Amber a little too much over the last few days as she has become snappy with me. I know that if I quizzed her about it I would get the normal, 'you over Analise things' and 'I'm worried about..' or 'nope its not a problem babes' this is all well and good but I want her to feel as if she can talk to me about anything.

I am so grateful for any time we get with each other and despite her looking like 'Bob' and the facial hair making a bit of a comeback I feel more comfortable with this side of her. This is thanks to my friends on Angels, as they are helping me to see the Amber within :)

I think that is enough for today!
hugz n kisses
Taz xXx